Always
by kristen5286
Summary: Katniss can no longer keep Peeta at arms length. Finally, she realizes she loves him and needs him. I'm writing this whole story in Peeta's POV. I will post the chapters at the end of this story. I do not own the Hunger Games or it's Characters. But I sure wish I did!
1. Chapter 1

Chapter One

It happens late one night. Early morning really. I wake up screaming as usual. Oh how I wish he was here. On the train, in the Capitol, he always held me. Kept the nightmares from returning. But I'm too stubborn. I don't touch him. Don't admit that I miss his strong arms holding me in the night. I need him. I am falling apart without him. Slowly, bit by bit. Why am I pushing him away? Why am I wasting precious time I could be spending with him? I would give anything to have more time with all the loved ones I've lost. My resolve strengthens. I need my rock, my dandelion in the spring, my hope. And yes, my love. I love Peeta. Of course I do. Of course I love the boy who saves me over and over and over.

I don't even look at the clock. I don't care what time it is. I'm not wasting another minute, another second not being with him. I get up and pull on my boots and coat and march over to his house. I know his door won't be locked. With Snow gone we no longer fear for our safety.

I quietly open the front door and close it behind me. The house smells of Peeta. It smells of bread and paint. Of home. As I stand in between the kitchen and the living room I know I have made the right decision coming here and I kick myself for not realizing all this sooner. I've been so selfish putting my pain first. Especially when he always put me first. He lost people he loved too. I haven't been here for him. Before I go any further I stop myself. Now is not the time for self-pity and loathing.

I walk up the stairs to his bedroom. His door is open and the moonlight from his open window lights his sleeping face. His peaceful, handsome, sleeping face. Instantly all my pain and hurting is forgotten. All I can think is how this boy sleeping before me is the answer to all my problems. He is my hope. He is my salvation.

I take off my boots and coat by the door and walk to the opposite side of the bed. I stare at him, sighing. Like he senses my presence he slowly opens his eyes, looking straight at me. As he watches me he quietly says "I've been waiting for you." Then he pulls back the covers so I can climb in.

He covers me up, wrapping his arms around me, pulling my head to his chest. I can hear his familiar heartbeat. Once he loosens up his hold on me I whisper, "I'm sorry I took so long."

He kisses my hair, breathes me in and says" You're here now, that's all that matters."

I turn my face to his, wanting to explain, to tell him every revelation I've had tonight. Knowing me as well as he does he just says "Shhh." Then softly kisses my lips. "We can talk in the morning. Right now I just want to hold you, Katniss. Hold you and sleep."

Staring into my eyes he kisses me one more time. A light brush of our lips. I want to deepen it but feel I should apologize, tell him everything before we go there. I settle myself back on his chest and quickly fall into a dreamless sleep.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two

My first thought when I wake is how glad I am that I finally came to Peeta. I haven't slept this well in months. I haven't moved and inch all night. I can feel his heart beating under my cheek. It's a steady, reassuring beat.

He must know that I am awake because he starts slowly stroking my arm. I lay still, enjoying the feel of his touch. His arms wrapped around me, breathing him in. I look up at him, he smiles down at me.

"Good morning, Katniss."

"Good morning, Peeta."

I half expect him to kiss me, but he doesn't. I guess we need to do the talking thing first.

"Peeta…" I start. He sits up, his back to the head board. I sit up too, crossing my legs, and face him. I start again. "Petta, I'm sorry."

"Sorry for what, Katniss?"

"I'm sorry for blocking you out. For not being here for you like you have been for me. I am sorry I was selfish and only thinking of my pain. You lost people too, and you've been grieving alone. I haven't given you my shoulder to lean on." I sigh heavily and say, "I'm sorry I didn't come to you sooner."

All while I'm talking he just sits there listening to me. Not moving. Not interrupting. Not touching me. I want him to touch me. I want to touch him. I don't. I'll wait till he's ready.

He thinks for a moment before he speaks, starring into my eyes. I start to panic. What if I'm too late? What if I lost my chance? Too much time has passed and I never once thought of his needs, his pains. I'm too selfish.

Then he looks down and says, "I was prepared to wait a lot longer for you to come to me. Forever really." He looks up at me, straight into my eyes. I can see the fire slowly starting to burn behind his blue eyes. "Don't you get it, Katniss? I have no life without you in it. Nothing else to live for. My days start and end with you. Your happiness is my happiness. It's all you, Katniss. It's always been you. It will always be you. Just you. Always."

With his last word I see the pain behind the fire. I've hurt him. I've hurt him by not being there for him, yes. But mostly I've hurt him for underestimating his patience with me. His love for me. His understanding that I needed time to heal myself before I could let anyone else in.

I grab his hand, searching his eyes desperately. "My whole life I've had to take care of someone other than myself. Prim. My mom. They needed me. You don't. You can survive without me, whereas they couldn't."

Oh, now he's really mad.

"Katniss, I can't! I do need you! Just like Prim. More than Prim. From the moment I first saw you when we were kids I lived each day knowing I'd see you. In the Games everything I did was to keep you alive. I wouldn't want to live in a world without you in it. I couldn't"

I can't take the distance anymore. I climb into his lap. There I kiss him. I grab his face, holding him steady and unleash all my pent up anger and pain and love and passion into this kiss. As I straddle him he moves his hands up my thighs to my hips and holds me to him. My arms wrap around his neck, my fingers reaching into his hair, pulling. I pull him to me, deepening our desperate kiss.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three

I get that feeling inside me, down in my stomach, like I got in the cave and on the beach. Our kiss changes from desperate, grabbing, and hard pressed mouths to slow, passionate kisses. We've only kissed like this one other time. I have a new type of need taking over my body. My mouth opens, I let his tongue in. I love his taste. I want more of the desperate kisses, but Peeta slows me, setting the pace. His hands slowly move from my hips up my back, pulling me into him. Then, slowly, he pulls away, looking into my eyes. I pout but eye him closely. He pushes a stay hair from my face then caresses my cheek.

For a long while we stay like that. Me on his lap facing him, his arms around my waist as our breathing steadies. He leans in and kisses me, his hands on my hips. Holding me still, keeping me from pressing up against him. As he pulls away again I groan in protest and before I even realize what's happening he's flipped me onto my back, laying in between my legs, pushing me into the mattress under his weight. I gasp, taken by surprise. He seizes this opportunity to kiss me. He kisses me long and deep, his tongue warring with mine. Before long I start to wiggle underneath him, wanting him closer. As close to me as possible. This is when he pulls away from me again and somehow I know that this time it's for good. For now, anyway. Peeta is a good man, better than I deserve. I know nothing more will happen between us right now than what has already transpired.

I sigh in resignation. This is why I love him Peeta. Because he is so good. In a world with so much band and wrong and hate, the universe managed to create one good thing. That one thing is Peeta Mellark. My Peeta.

"That was… fun." He says.

I kind of laugh, kind of sigh. "Yeah, it was" I reply.

He rolls off of me and props up on his elbow, lying on this side. I am cold now that he is off of me and I shiver. He pulls the covers up and scoots me closer to him. He kisses my forehead then rests his to mine, closes his eyes and whispers, "I'm happy that you're here."

I wait till he pulls back and opens his eyes to respond. When he does I look him straight in the eyes and say "I'm happy that I'm here too. I've been wanting this, needing this, for a long time, Peeta."

His smile starts out small then grows. Peeta is happy. I made him happy. The feeling that knowledge gives me is indescribable.

Still grinning at me he says rather than asks, "What do you want to do today?"

"Bake" I say. He looks puzzled. "I want to bake bread with you."

"Really?" He asks. "You want to bake bread?"

"With you, of course. I love watching you bake." I say. "Plus, I bet Haymitch hasn't had solid food in days." He nods in agreement and hops out of bed. Then, he pulls the covers off of me saying "Up you go, lazy bones." I scowl at him but I get up. Instead of going home for clothes I walk to his closet and pick some pants and a shirt that fit, mostly.

After I get the pants on I turn as I'm pulling his shirt over my head and gasp. He's startled me. He was standing right behind me, watching me dress. He wraps his arms around my waish and I look up into his eyes. He's smiling again.

"You look good in my clothes, Katniss."

"I don't think I could say the same for you, Peeta." At that he laughs and then kisses me.

All too soon he pulls away and grabs my hand. He leads me downstairs to the kitchen. He turns to me, picks me up by my waist and I squeal in surprise as he sets me on the counter.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter Four

By the time we're done making cinnamon rolls I think there is more flour on me than in the rolls. I am happy. Our entire day was spent baking, kissing, and making a huge mess. We walk hand in hand with the cinnamon rolls over to Haymithch's.

We don't bother knocking and walk right in. We find Haymitch at the kitchen table. He looks up at us then down to our joined hands. A smirk crosses his face.

"I see you've finally come to your senses, sweetheart." I can tell he must have just woken up because he doesn't sound drunk yet.

"Yup, I finally did." I say smiling up into Peeta's eyes. He smiles back down at me and gives me a sweet, quick kiss.

"Get a room you two." Haymitch groans.

"We brought you cinnamon rolls. " Peeta says before I can make a sarcastic remark regarding Haymitch's last statement. "Katniss even helped make them."

Looking me up and down Haymitch says "Looks like she rolled around in the dough more than help make these." Haymitch takes a bite out of one of the rolls Peeta has just put down on the table. "Not too bad, sweetheart." He mumbles with a mouth full of roll.

"Thanks Haymitch. Well, Peeta and I will go now." As much as I enjoy Haymitch's sour disposition I'm ready to be alone with Peeta again.

"See you later Haymitch." Peeta calls as we're walking back to the front door. We hear Haymitch say something in response but his mouth is so full we can't understand him.

When we get back to Peeta's house he tells me to go on up and shower while he cleans up the kitchen. When I'm done I grab more of his clothes to wear. I choose some sweat pants and a t-shirts.

While Peeta showers and changes I pick out some food for us to have for dinner. Some chicken from the butchers, bread, and goats cheese. I stop moving. Prim. The grief hits me fast and hard like a train racing down the tracks. I crumble to the floor in the middle of the kitchen and begin sobbing. Peeta walks in a few minutes later and rushes to me. He scoops me up and carries me up the stairs to his bed, the food completely forgotten.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter Five

At some point in the night I must have fallen asleep because when I startle awake it's dark out. I haven't stopped crying, even in my sleep. I have fresh tears running down my cheeks. Peeta is gone. That's the next thing I register. I panic. Did I dream we were together again? No, I didn't. I'm in his room and I'm wearing his clothes. But where is he?

"Peeta?" I call out. I hear him coming up the stairs. I let out the breath I didn't realize I was holding. Quickly, I wipe the tears from my face, not wanting him to see I was still crying.

He comes into the room carrying a tray. I realize now that I smell bread. Cheesy buns. He baked them for me, knowing they're my favorite. He has 2 glasses of cold water too. Good. I'm very thirsty. I must have cried my weight in tears.

I smile at him as he sets the tray down on the bed and sits down next to me. He leans over to kiss my forehead. I close my eyes. I love him.

"Let's eat." He says. And we do in silence. I eat four buns. I was starving. I drank all my water in one big gulp. Peeta passes me his water. I start to protest but he says "I brought it for you." I drink that down after I finish my buns.

"Feeling better?" He asks softly. I nod and kiss him on the cheek. "Thank you" I say "for everything."

He smiles "That's what I'm here for, Katniss."

"I'll be right back. I'm going to take the tray down to the kitchen."

"Ok" I tell him. I settle back down in the covers and wait for him to return. When he does I curl up on his bare chest, tracing my fingers in his soft blond curls. He sighs.

"That feels nice. He says. I look up at him. He grabs my chin gently in his fingers and tilts my head back to kiss me. It's a sweet, soft, slow kiss. I sigh against his lips and he parts mine with his tongue. Oh, I like this. Leaning over him I prop myself up with my hands on his chest. His hands move to cradle my head. Slowly I climb on top of him while he continues his slow assault on my lips, my tongue, my nerves, my soul.

After a minute or two of lying on top of him, kissing, he starts to sit up so I am straddling him. The heat starts to build. Our kisses grow hungry and our hands more frantic. We're touching each other all over. Arms, shoulders, backs. Grabbing at clothes, pulling hair. Before I know it he has taken my shirt off. We stop kissing. He leans back to look at me. I start to blush. He's never seen me without a shirt on before.

"You're so beautiful, Katniss" he tells me in such a loving, honest way that I am no longer shy. He loves me, for me. As I love him. I have no reason to be shy. His hands come up to my waist and stop. Looking me in the eyes I can tell he's silently asking for permission to touch me, higher. Not breaking eye contact I grab his hands and slowly lead them up my body till his hands cover me. He inhales sharply as he feels the weight of me in his palms. His eyes dart down to where he's touching me and I watch his face. I watch him as he explores parts of me he has never seen before. Touching, squeezing, pulling, and, finally, he brings his lips down to taste.

With my hands on his shoulders I let my head fall back and close my eyes as his hands and mouth discover every dip and curve of my upper body. A moan escapes my lips and then his mouth is back on mine. Kissing me deeply, his arms holding me tightly to him, our bare chests pressed together. My heart races as I realize where we're headed. I'm suddenly nervous and excited all at once.

Slowly, Peeta lays down, rolling so he's on top of me. His lips never leave mine. He sits up to pull his sweat pants down my legs, taking them off, drinking in every inch of my exposed and flushed body. Then he stands to take his own pants off, making sure he doesn't get them caught on his prosthetic leg. As I watch him, I memorize every new inch of him I haven't seen before. He climbs back on top of me, in between my parted legs. Hovering over me he looks at me lying beneath him as I look at him above me. He kisses me one last time then asks, "Are you sure Katniss?"

And in that moment I know that I am. That this is right. Peeta and me. I'm glad that we're both experiencing this for the first time together. "Yes, I'm sure" I tell him

My heart is pounding as he positions himself over me. I can feel his heart beating fast under my hand. I kiss him there, over his heart. And then I kiss his lips, our tongues joining in a familiar pattern. While we kiss he slowly, painfully, sweetly moves into me. And now he is mine as I am his. Fully and completely one, now and forever.

I let him set the gentle pace that we move at for what seems like forever. Peeta loving me, in every way he can is my undoing. I know I'll never love another for as long as I live as I do him.

When, finally, we are finished and our pounding hearts beat slower and our breathing returns to normal we lay there in each others arms he whispers "You love me. Real or not real?"

I tell him, "Real."


	6. Chapter 1 Peeta POV

Always in Peeta's POV

Since I've been back in 12 things with Katniss have been strained at best. I expected as much. At first, anyway. I'm starting to wonder if things will ever be better between us. Most of my memories are back and it's much easier for me to tell the real ones apart from the hijacked ones. I have my bad moments, though. But I've gotten good at controlling them. Focusing on things on things that I know are real. When one of those shiny memories takes over my mind I do something very similar to what Dr. Aurelius has Katniss do when her mind starts slipping. I say to myself all the truths and memories I know the Capitol hasn't tampered with.

_My name is Peeta Mellark. I am from district 12. I had 2 brothers. My parents owned the bakery in town. I decorated the cakes. _

Once the pain and urges to kill pass I let out a shaky breath and bake. I bake a lot. I paint too. Without a bakery to help run or anything else to occupy my time I usually end up in either my kitchen or study, where I paint. I paint every memory I have that I know is real. I paint my entire life as if I'm telling a story. Sometimes, when my mind is being hijacked, going into my study and looking at the paintings helps me differentiate between what's real and what's not real. Since I couldn't possibly eat everything I bake I give most of it away. I make cheesy buns for Katniss, her favorite. Haymitch likes my cinnamon rolls. Everyone else in town takes whatever else I was in the mood to make that day.

As much as I enjoy painting and baking I'm lonely. Very lonely. Haymitch is usually too drunk to spend much time with. Though, I do go see him a few times a week. Sometimes we play chess. He's helped me as much as possible with my 'real or not real' game. And sometimes I just clean up his kitchen while he's passed out drunk. I see Katniss too. But mostly those visits are awkward. Especially for her. I can tell she doesn't know what to do about me. She loves me, this I can tell. Plus, Haymitch has told me so as well. But I can see that she's worried I'll snap one day and try to kill her again. She also finds it hard to be happy when she's lost so much. She thinks she isn't allowed happiness, especially since Prim is dead. She's never told me this but I hear her. She talks to herself. When I'm outside I don't even pretend to not listen. She's never noticed me doing so before, though. Or I'm sure she'd stop talking all together.

Every day I hope that today is the day that Katniss comes to me. And every night I go to bed disappointed. Before I turn out my lights to go to bed each night I open my window and stare out towards her house. I try and will her to come to me. She never does.

Until one night. I'm sleeping lightly, but thankfully peacefully. My nightmares haven't made an appearance yet. Something, call it my intuition, wakes me up. I feel her presence before I even open my eyes. When I do open them I see her standing by the by bed, watching me.

"I've been waiting for you." I tell her and pull back the covers so she can climb in next to me. She's here! I want to pinch myself to be certain I'm not dreaming. Finally, my Katniss is here. She finally sought me out.

As soon as she's in bed next to me I cover her up and pull her to my chest, wrapping my arms around her. At first I hold her tightly, relishing the feel of her in my arms again. God, she fells good. Better than I remembered. When I loosen my hold on her she whispers to me "I'm sorry I took so long." I smile to myself and kiss her hair breathing in her wonderful scent.

"You're here now, that's all that matters." And that's the truth. Katniss is here, in my bed, in my arms, and nothing else matters.

She looks up at me and in her eyes I can tell she has a lot on her mind. I know she wants to talk but right now I don't even think I could form sentences. I'm in a state of shock and disbelief at my good fortune. I tell her "Shhh." Do I dare? Oh yes, I do! I kiss her lips. Oh, wow! Yes. I remember her lips. "We can talk in the morning. Right now I just want to hold you, Katniss. Hold you and sleep." I brave one more brief and beautiful kiss. I can feel her melting into me. She wants this almost as much as I do, it seems.

She settles her head back on my chest, right over my heart that beats only for her. I fall asleep quickly now that I have the only thing I've ever truly wanted safe in my arms.


	7. Chapter 2 Peeta POV

Peeta POV

I wake up before her and am relieved to find her still in my arms. It wasn't a dream. She really did come to me last night. I look down at her sleeping face and just watch her. My heart swells with love for this girl. Woman. She's not a girl anymore. After all we've been through we're far from the kids we were the day of the reaping that sent us into our first Games.

Her breathing changes and I know she's woken up. I start stroking her arm. Slowly, up and down. I can feel some of the burn scars marring her beautiful skin. I don't care. I love her more for them. They remind me that we've both been through the same things. We match. She looks up at me with those big, beautiful, gray eyes of hers. I smile.

"Good morning Katniss."  
"Good morning Peeta."

I want to kiss her. Bad. She looks like an angel with the sun lighting her face. I don't, though. I remember her eyes last night. We need to talk before we get distracted with kissing, and touching, and… Stop. Focus Peeta.

"Peeta…" she says. Ok, here we go. I sit up with my back to the headboard. She sits up facing me, her legs crossed. Hair is falling out of her braid, framing her face. Her face is too thin. She needs to take better care of herself, before she wastes away. "Peeta, I'm sorry."

Huh? Sorry? "Sorry for what, Katniss?"

"I'm sorry for blocking you out. For not being here for you like you haven been for me. I'm sorry I was selfish and only thinking of my pain. You lost people too and you've been grieving alone. I haven't given you my shoulder to lean on." She lets out a big, shaky breath. "I'm sorry I didn't come to you sooner."

I'm in shock. I can't move, I can't speak. She cares. There are no more Games and no more cameras around and she cares. For real. I mean, I knew, but to hear her say it, hear her admit it to me. It's amazing. I stare into her eyes trying to form a response. I don't even know where to begin. Obviously, I'm going to avoid professing my undying love for her. But she needs to hear how I feel about her now that I'm healing and have most of my memories back. I see the panic forming in her eyes. I'm taking forever to respond.

I look down. "I was prepared to wait a lot longer for you to come to me. Forever really." I look up, hoping I hadn't freaked her out with my confession. When I see I haven't I continue. My emotions start taking over as I tell her "Don't you get it Katniss? I have no life without you in it. Nothing else to live for. My days start and end with you. Your happiness is my happiness. It's all you Katniss. It's always been you. It will always be you. Just you. Always."

Oops. So much for subtlety. I told myself I wouldn't spill my guts but I did anyway. I don't care. It's been too long coming. For years I've loved Katniss. For a while I thought she loved me too. My heart was crushed to find out it was all an act for the Games. I get it. It was to help us both survive. But that didn't stop the pain the truth brought with it. But then we were thrust into the arena again and I felt it. Felt the change in her. That night on the beach, she wasn't kissing me for the cameras. I could feel the difference in her. After all the hundreds of fake kisses I could feel the true passion behind that one. Then, again, we were ripped apart. Even after the rebels saved me I was not returned to her. Not in the way she needed me. I could see it in her eyes in 13, how she finally really loved me. But I didn't, not for a few months anyway. All I felt for her was a strong urge to kill her. The damage was done. She didn't trust me anymore. When I came back to 12 I could see the doubt in her eyes. Her hesitation to being around me . I was left heartbroken, once again.

She grabs my hand and looks into my eyes. Straight through them to the depths of my soul.

"My whole life I've had to take care of someone other than myself. Prim. My mom. They needed me. You don't. You can survive without me, whereas they couldn't."

Now I'm mad. Is she serious? "Katniss, I can't. I do need you. Just like Prim. More than Prim. From the moment I first saw you when we were kids I lived each day knowing I'd see you. In the Games, everything I did was to keep you alive. I wouldn't want to live in a world without you in it. I couldn't."

As soon as the words are out of my mouth she's coming at me. She grabs my face and climbs into my lap. Before I even have time to process what's happening she kisses me. Wow! This is like the kiss from the beach. Better. As she's straddling me, kissing me like her life depends on it, I think to myself how I couldn't get any happier. The girl of my dreams is making all the moves, on her own. For herself. Not because she's being forced to. I feel all the emotion she's pouring into this kiss. Pain, love, anger, and passion. I slowly move my hands up her thighs, feeling my way to her hips. Her arms go around my neck, her hands in my hair. I pull her to me, holding her flush against my chest. I deepen our kiss, tasting her. I want more.


	8. Chapter 3 Peeta POV

Peeta POV

Chapter 3

After a few minutes of desperately kissing and pawing at each other we slow down. I want to savor her. Savor this moment. I've loved her my whole life but I never imagined I'd ever have her like this. In my bed, kissing me with as much passion as I am kissing her. As our tongues tangle she tries to pick up the pace but I slow her, again. I move my hands up her back, pulling her into me as I slow her down, letting the hunger grow. I need to slow down. I'm getting carried away. She overwhelms my senses. I pull away, breaking the kiss, and look into her eyes. She pouts. She's so adorable when she pouts. I suppress my grin. I push a stray hair out of her face then hold her cheek in my palm.

For what seems like a lifetime we stay like this. Her in my lap facing me. My arms wrapped around her, her hands on my chest. Just looking into each others eyes. My mind races with thoughts and hopes and dreams. Everything I've ever wanted is literally in the palm of my hands. My hands go back down to her hips as I kiss her, sweetly. I can feel her trying to get closer to me, but I hold her still, not wanting for things to get out of control. I'm barely holding on to my sanity as it was.

I pull away from her again, instantly feeling the loss in my heart. She groans when I do. What little hold I had on my control is gone. I flip her on her back and lay between her parted legs. Oh god. She gasps in surprise and I take full advantage and kiss her. I can taste everything she's feeling. Her desire, her passion, her heat, her hunger. I want to devour her. In the back of my mind I'm doing backflips. She feels so good beneath me. This was worth the wait. Definitely. I feel her start to move under me. Her hips pressing up against mine. My body is reacting to hers in the only way it knows how. Damn. I pull away again. We're not ready for more. As much as I want her, we just found each other again last night. It's too soon. If, no when, this goes further I want there to be no regrets.

"That was… fun." I say

"Yeah, it was." She kind of laughs.

I move off of her onto my side, propping myself up on my elbow. Gosh, she's beautiful. I see her shiver so I cover her up and pull her to my chest. I kiss her forehead then rest mine against hers. She feels like home. I close my eyes and whisper "I'm happy you're here Katniss."

She doesn't say anything. I knew things were moving too quickly. Nervously, I pull back and look her in the eyes.

"I'm happy I'm here too. I've been wanting this for a long time, Peeta."

Oh thank goodness. I'm so relieved. I smile a small smile but I can't contain my joy in hearing her say these words. I am so happy. I guess after all the pain and loss in my life I've finally earned a little happiness.

"What do you want to do today?" I ask her.

"Bake." What? She wants to bake? "I want to bake bread with you."

I'm confused. I thought she hated cooking. I knew she wasn't very good at it. "Really? You want to bake bread?"

"With you, of course. I love watching you bake." She says. "Plus, I bet Haymitch hasn't had solid food in days."

Ah, yes. He probably hasn't. I nod in agreement. I jump out of bed and pull the covers off her, smiling, as I say "Up you go lazy bones." She scowls at me but gets up anyway.

I throw on my discarded pants and shirt from the floor by the bed. I turn and watch her as she pulls some pants on. My pants. She isn't wearing a shirt. I can see her beautifully scarred back. My mouth goes dry. I can't help myself as I slowly walk towards her. She turns to face me as she's pulling my shirt over her head. My shirt. My pants. She gasps in surprise. She didn't hear me approaching. I smile down at her as I wrap my arms around her waist.

"You look good in my clothes, Katniss."

"I don't think I could say the same for you, Peeta." I laugh. Then I kiss her. I love her.

I pull away, grabbing her hand as I lead her downstairs. Once we're in the kitchen I turn to pick her up at her waist and put her on the counter. She squeals in surprise. It's a beautiful sound.


	9. Chapter 4 Peeta POV

Peeta POV

Chapter 4

We spend the whole day in the kitchen. Katniss is covered in flour and various other ingredients. I don't think I could have dreamed up a better day if I tried. Laughing at something she's said I kiss her for at least the hundredth time. She tastes sweet as sugar. When the cinnamon rolls are done baking we walk them over to Haymitch's.

Knocking on his door is pointless since he's usually too drunk to hear it anyway. Or passed out. We walk in and head straight to the kitchen. He looks up at us then down and sees that we're holding hands. I see him smirk, I smile.

"I see you've finally come to your senses, sweetheart." He says to Katniss. He sounds pretty sober.

"Yep, I finally did." She says smiling, looking up at me. I smile back down at her. I can tell Haymitch is starting to frustrate her. I kiss her.

"Get a room you two." Haymitch says.

"We brought you cinnamon rolls." I say hoping to calm things down before they get heated. I swear, Katniss and Haymitch are worse than cats and dogs sometimes. "Katniss even helped make them."

He looks Katniss up and down and says "Looks like she rolled around in the dough more than help make these." I set the rolls down on the table. He grabs on and takes a bit. "Not too bad, sweetheart." He says with a mouth full of roll.

I feel Katniss fidgeting "Thanks Haymitch. Peeta and I will go now." I laugh to myself. These two are hopeless.

"See you later Haymitch." I holler as we're leaving. He mumbles something but I can't make it out over all the food in his mouth. I smile. It's always nice to see him in a feisty mood.

Back at my house I tell Katniss to go on up and shower while I clean up the kitchen. I chuckle as I remember Katniss trying to measure out all the flour we'd need, only having it be sugar instead. I really don't think my day could get any better. Well, it'll be better when I hold her in my arms as we fall asleep tonight. Yeah, I like that.


	10. Chapter 5 Peeta POV

Peeta POV

Chapter 5

When she's done, Katniss comes down to the kitchen. I've just finished cleaning up. I kiss her then head up to shower myself. She said she was going to get something together for our dinner. Seeing her in more of my clothes does telling things to my body. She looks so sexy in my sweat pants and t-shirt with her hair wet and dripping along the front of the shirt. The wet spots were clinging to her skin, accentuating the top curve of her breasts.

As I take a cold shower I try to calm my racing heart and steer my thoughts down a much safer path. Katniss has always done this to me, without her even knowing it. When we slept together on the train and in the Capitol I had to fight almost every waking second to keep my thoughts innocent about the girl curled up on my chest. I, especially, had to work hard to keep my body from reacting to hers.

When I am done I dry off and pull on some clean pajama pants, no shirt. I think I hear muffled cries so I head downstairs quickly and rush to the kitchen. Where is Katniss? I walk around the island and see her curled into a ball on the floor, crying uncontrollably. As I hurry to her side I notice the goat's cheese sitting on the counter. Prim. I pick her up and carry her to my bed. I hold her and whisper soothing words for an hour before she finally passes out from exhaustion. I hold her close for another hour then, quietly, I slip out of bed, covering her up and kissing her forehead before I head back down to the kitchen.

I set about making cheese buns. Once they are baking in the oven I start to put away the food she had gotten out for us. I hide the goat cheese in the back of the fridge. I'll take it to Greasy Sae tomorrow. I had completely forgotten I had it. I feel horrible. My sweet Katniss was finally having a good day and I go and ruin it with my carelessness.

When the buns are done I pile 6 on a plate, pour 2 glasses of water, and set everything up on a serving tray. As I'm making my way upstairs I hear her call my name. I smile to myself. I walk through the door and I see relief flood her face. She smiles at me as I place the tray on the bed. I sit down next to her and kiss her forehead. Her eyes close and my heart skips a beat.

"Let's eat." I say. And she does. She gulps her water down in one large drink then devours 4 rolls. I see her eyeing my water and I offer it to her. She starts to protest so I pretend like it was for her all along and say "I brought it for you." She drinks that quickly, too. She must be dehydrated from all the crying.

"Feeling better?" I ask, eyeing her closely. She nods and kisses my cheek.

"Thank you, for everything." She replies.

"That's what I'm here for Katniss." I say. "I'll be right back. I'm going to take the tray down to the kitchen." I get up and head down, tray in hand.

"Ok." I hear her say as I'm headed towards the hallway.

When I get back I climb into bed with her and she lies on my chest, running her hands through my chest hair. I sigh. This feels so right. "That feels nice." I tell her. She looks up at me with her deep gray eyes, endless pools of emotion. I grab her chin as gently as I can manage and bring her lips up to mine. They are so soft. I just want to take her. I want to flip her over and show her how much I love her. But I don't. I'll let her set the pace. After tonight I don't want to push her. But I do want a little more. I run my tongue over her soft, swollen lips and she takes the hint, opening her mouth. As our kisses deepen she sits up over me, her hands on my chest. I grab her head in my hands, keeping her from breaking our kiss. Obviously she hadn't planned on doing that because she is slowly climbing on top of me. I kiss her with my lips, my heart, and my soul. Desperate to have her feel every emotion I have inside for her.

I sit up so she is in my lap, straddling me. I can feel the heat from in between her legs radiate through my lower region. My control is starting to slip. I start touching her all over while she grabs at my hair, my arms, and my face. I'm pulling her hair back so I can deepen our kiss and drag her against my body. I want to feel her chest against mine with no barrier in between. Swiftly, I pull her shirt off. I can tell she barely registers it at first. I lean back from her so I can see her. She starts to blush as I appreciate her.

"You are so beautiful Katniss." I tell her with as much sincerity as I possibly can. Because it's true; she is. I look into her eyes as I move my hands up her waist. I stop, waiting for permission to go higher. She doesn't nod or anything. Instead she grabs my hands and moves them for me. She places my hands over her breasts and I immediately look down. Her breasts are on the smaller side but they feel great in my hands, where they fit perfectly. I run my fingers over her, hardening her nipples. I start to tug at them and roll them between my thumb and forefinger. I can't help myself; I lean forward and taste her.

As I swirl my tongue around one peak, lightly nipping at it with my teeth and sucking, I mimic with my fingers on the other one. Then switch. She tastes how I imagine the woods would. I hear her moan. That singularly most beautiful sound breaks my trance and I am kissing her again. I wrap my arms around her waist and press her to me, loving the feel of our bare chests pressed together.

I lay her down on the bed, rolling so I'm on top. I realize now that she isn't going to stop me. This is it. I'm finally going to be able to make love to the woman of my dreams. I've imagined it so many times, so many different ways, but the reality is more unbelievable and amazing than anything I could have ever dreamt.

I sit up and take my pants off of her. I am hurting with how much I want her. Her perfect, scarred body is like a feast lay before a starving man. I want to explore every single inch of her with my hands, my lips, and my tongue. But not tonight. Tonight I am about to lose what little sanity I have left if I don't burry myself in her soon.

I stand up to take my own pants off, leaving us both completely naked. Together. For the first time. I look at her as her eyes scour my scarred and very aroused body. I see the desire burning in her eyes. I settle myself back on top of her between her parted legs. Oh god.

"Are you sure Katniss?" I ask her, giving her one last chance to stop.

"Yes, I'm sure." She says. My prayers have been answered. She places her hand over my erratically beating heart and kisses me there. Then she kisses my lips. Our tongues join together just as our bodies are about to. I slowly start pushing myself into her agonizingly slow to ease her pain. Her breath only hitches once when I break through her virginity.

And now she is mine and I am hers. Fully and completely one. Now and forever.

I move in her, with her, at a slow and gentle pace. I last much longer than I expected. I just didn't want to stop this feeling. Loving her like this, showing her, is all I've ever wanted to do. I will never love another for as long as I'm living.

When, finally, we are finished and our breathing returns to normal we lay there in each others arms and I whisper "You love me. Real or not real?"

She tells me "Real."


End file.
